this sucks, this sucks, this sucks, this sucks

Saw Marks today and got the official word that lung transplant is my only option. And hopefully it is an option.
They will check out my insurance and hopefully not get a rejection. The new super sized, super expensive insurance won't start until Jan. 1st.

Then it is on to the transplant team to see if I can even qualify. He says there will be a lot more medical tests along with them looking at our financial situation (not good due to tons of medical bills from Chris's back which was the result of that damn accident... I wonder if I can shoot the ass who hit us) making sure I have support to get to appointments and I get to see a shrink to make sure I have the right attitude and will comply with all requests. Then they will determine if I can get new lungs.

My weight and financial situation are hinderences but my age, activity leval, wish to keep working and attitude are on my side.
Chris pushed a bit and we got the answer that without a transplant my prognosis is 2 to 3 years. I refuse to accept that.

Dr Levine (who is patient rated the highest along with Marks) is who I will be referred to if the insurance approves San Antonio for the transplant. If not Dallas or Houston may be a possibility. I HATE health insurance companies can control needed care.

Talked with Sharon and told her what was going on. I figured I had to be totally honest because she knows enough to know if I'm hiding stuff from her. Going to go with the "I need a transplant" without the "without it I have only a few years to live" with everyone else. Hopefully they won't figure it out. I hate to stress the girls. They don't need to worry.

I just really want to make this easier on Chris. Gotta find him a new wife. LMAO He thinks I am kidding, I am but I;m not. I love him and want someone to take care of him when I am gone.

On a lighter note, I maxed out my debit card and bought a Naturaworld pillow for $60. It feels like down but is latex filled. Praying I can sleep in bed and not wake p hacking away from using down pillows. A new mini comforter is next... Maybe I'll make an anti-die quilt. lol

Forgot to ask Brandy about Jasons interview.
Ann is supposed to upload pics from her camera to the computer but hasn't done it yet. I can't wait to see the kids dressed up for a wedding.

Christa, Ro and the girls are coming for Thanksgiving. Ro is bringing a ham he got from work and we'll probably order a turkey from HEB so I don't have to cook. Making dressing and mashed potatoes wheather I feel like it or not. Going to get one of those great apple pies from Costco that Greg bought us last year. Adore that guy. He is so sweet when he comes over. He always asks how I am and is truly concerned.